You are currently browsing the monthly archive for April 2009.
As a young kid with little guidance and supervision, I followed the lead of many of the older kids in our housing project and took a lot of my anger out directly and indirectly on weaker, vulnerable living creatures. I wanted to be like Jocko, Floyd and MacDuffy, so I got into a number of fistfights, but only with kids I knew I could beat up. As a baseball pitcher, I would often deliberately hit the batters I faced. In football and basketball, an errant elbow would frequently find an unsuspecting target. My nickname in junior high and high school was “Crazyman.”
Unskillful in the Wild
I also took my frustrations out on animals. We had a miniature Doberman pinscher named Buster. Buster used to bite and growl, after which I would beat him with my belt, which of course only made him bite and growl all the more. I also used to hunt in the woods surrounding New Haven with homemade slingshots, bows and arrows and spears. I would use them on squirrels, snakes, birds and rabbits. 
Specific creatures at great risk every spring were the lamprey eels that would course through the brooks in the woods. Their fearsome, round, tooth-filled mouths and fanged tongues never failed to send me into an adrenaline-filled frenzy. With a hand-carved oak spear, I would chase them through the brook, flip them onto land and then beat them bloody. Not the most skillful ways to channel hot emotions. Less than effective for optimal brain integration too, it turns out.
Lack of Integration
Hot emotions seem to signal a lack of neural processing ability. It’s apparently one reason that little kids throw tantrums – they have minimal language capacity to allow them to transfer right brain feelings into left brain words. This is something that skillful parents need to model and teach kids to practice. “Use words,” was a frequent directive in school and at home as my daughter was growing up. This essential process – moving feelings and images that emotionally affect us from the right side where they are initially recorded – over to the left side where language and linear thinking primarily lives, appears to be a fundamental integrative neural necessity. Some researchers also think that it is one of the fundamental functions that sleep and dreaming provides us. And why we become psychotic when we go for extended periods without REM sleep. My behavior as a kid would seem to suggest that sleep and dreaming alone is insufficient – that we become psychotic without constructive, nurturing models and other effective emotional outlets as well.
Emotions Number Nine
For research purposes, scientists distinguish between emotions and feelings. USC neuroscience researcher, Antonio Damasio has suggested that feelings be used to refer to the private experience of an emotion, and that emotions should be used to designate feelings that are publicly observable. Nine emotions turn out to be readily observable in infants. They show up on their faces as Paul Holinger explains in What Babies Say Before They Can Talk:
The two positive feelings are interest and enjoyment; the feeling which resets the nervous system and gets it ready for other stimuli is called surprise; and the six negative feelings are distress, anger, fear, shame, disgust (a reaction to bad taste) and dissmell (a reaction to bad odors). Each of these feelings is signaled by a specific facial expression in your baby. These facial expressions provide the signals which help you understand what your baby is feeling. These nine feelings operate on a scale from low to high: interest-to-excitement, enjoyment-to-joy, surprise-to-startle, distress-to-anguish, anger-to-rage, fear-to-terror, shame-to-humiliation, and varying levels of disgust and dissmell.
These same nine emotions and more show up on adult’s faces as well. Malcolm Gladwell has detailed the many ways they do so in his riveting New Yorker article: The Naked Face.
The Body Holds the Key
I’m convinced the body needs to be actively involved in channeling hot emotions, especially those that emerge resulting from buried past emotional trauma, which seems to be what most adult emotional reactivity appears to be in my experience. I guess that’s why I resonate so strongly with A Course in Miracles Lesson 5: “I am never upset for the reason I think.” It’s always something old and early in my personal history coming back around, apparently looking for healing integration, often involving self-forgiveness.
One program that I’ve mentioned before that I think does a profoundly powerful job of working with the body and providing ways to constructively channel hot emotions is City at Peace. In that program inner city kids in trouble are supported in writing out, choreographing and performing their personal life stories. Many come through the program wholly transformed. Had this program been around when I was growing up, much suffering would very likely have been avoided. To bear witness to the benefits that constructively channeling hot emotions produces is to make one a believer in miracles.
I’ve been thinking some about reincarnation and karma recently. The older I get, and the more social neuroscience I study, the more open and hopeful I get. Being aware of previous incarnations may simply be a function of how powerfully connected and integrated our brains (and hearts?) have become during any current incarnation. Those of us with no memories of past lives may simply lack the processing power necessary to be consciously aware of them (which would be most of us, apparently). It’s a lot of information to be expected to retain, especially when what happened last Tuesday is currently a challenge for me to accurately recall.
But concern over whether or not I’ll be returning carrying much of the karmic Samsonite I’ve been hauling around in this incarnation, seems mostly to miss the point. Better to bet like Pascal, I think: If reincarnation and karma are true, and I’ve led a depraved and low-minded life in this incarnation, then things mostly likely won’t be so good for me, my family and friends next time around. If reincarnation and karma are not true and I’ve led a depraved and low-minded life, then things probably aren’t so good for me and those same people in this life. If karma and reincarnation are true however, and I’ve led a saintly life filled with great merit and good works, then things most likely are quite good for me in this life. And the life I have coming up on-deck is probably looking pretty good as well. So, it’s that life that I want to begin planning right now.
My Next First Three Years
In preparation, as a safeguard, I’m putting my order in for how I want the first three years of my next life to go. Attachment, neuroscience and interpersonal neurobiology research suggests that these years are crucial – I will carry their imprint with me – appended to whatever traits and qualities I beam in with – through every day of every year that follows. So, in the best of all possible worlds, I will be conceived by young, wealthy people, since old sperm seems to be suspect in the development of autism, and there are many studies that suggest that poverty is extremely damaging to neural development. These young, wealthy people should live in Hawaii where people experience the lowest rates of Frequent Mental Distress (FMD), and they can be gay or straight, it doesn’t really matter to me. My leanings are more toward a gay female couple, since the suffering many gay people have been forced to endure frequently manages to inspire them to deal creatively with a complex world, and often provides them with the necessary sense of humor to do so. At least in my experience.
My brain begins unfolding shortly after the first month post-conception. Apparently, its development is primarily driven by sound - the first sense to appear – and I will quickly learn to discriminate mother’s voice from all other sounds in the womb. And numerous studies suggest that I will recognize her voice immediately, post-partum. Given this research, I want my birth mother to have a great singing voice – a combination of Tori Amos, Joan Osborne and Susan Boyle. And I want her to sing and coo to me from the first post-conception month forward. I also want her to talk to me the way she will when I’m outside in the world while I’m still inside her. When I’m finally born, I want it to be a natural, drug-free birth, and I want to have two siblings already arrived and practiced on by my parents for two and five years prior. I don’t want to be their beta-baby.
The Years Have It
There will be a lot of smiling, soothing physical contact, loving eye-gazing and breast feeding during these first three years. Breast feeding is great for me and significantly reduces my mother’s risk of heart attack for her whole life. And in addition to being wealthy, I want my parents to have very high intellectual, emotional and social IQ’s. I also want them to head their own nonprofit charitable foundations. We know that altruism works powerfully to positively affect health and well-being and neural growth and integration, and I want to have as much of that going for me as I possibly can. Altruism is also great for continuing the good karma I’ll already be beaming in with.
I want my mother to spend a lot of time socializing, learning and hanging out with other mothers, while I spend quality, supervised time with their kids. And when the language window is open at 18-24 months, I want my parents to expose me to two or three different non-native languages, using the Super-Memo method if they think I might benefit from it. Taking specific advantage of the open language window appears to generally strengthen the overall neural network. No reason not to start early with that regimen.
Finally, I want both my parents, as well as every caregiver I come in contact with, to be experts in stress recognition and management. I want them to be expert soothers, creative rapid restorers of allostatic nirvana. Their actions as external stress reducing agents will quickly help me to learn to recognize, manage and reduce my own elevated stress levels at a very early age. This will serve me well for the whole remaining 200 years of what average life-expectancy will most likely be for my next life.
And that’s pretty much it. I don’t think that’s asking for all that much, actually. And if I don’t bother to ask, how’s The Re-Birth Fairy going to know this is what I want?
There seems to be a great hue and cry in the wake of the current global economic downturn, that while we have great quantities of information at our fingertips, what we aren’t so easily able to extract from all this data … is wisdom. Nevertheless, wisdom, it turns out, presents an identifiable signature in our brain. That’s the good news – we can find it by its signature.
For purposes of this research, scientists at The Stein Institute for Research at UC San Diego combed the neuroscience literature using keywords that involved attributes such as empathy, self-understanding, compassion or altruism, emotional stability, pro-social concerns and a tolerance for others’ values. These are generally considered to be cross-cultural components of wisdom.
What Dilip Jeste and Thomas Meeks found in their review of functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) studies is that contemplating a situation calling for altruism activates a front part of the brain called the medial pre-frontal cortex. If moral decision-making is under consideration, then the brain appears to fire up rational thinking areas – the dorsolateral prefrontal cortex – emotional/social areas – the medial pre-frontal cortex – and conflict detection areas – the anterior cingulate cortex, sometimes associated with what’s commonly thought of as our “sixth sense.” Thus, the brain seems to make great use of the prefrontal areas, the place where optimal integration and connectivity appears to be able to keep our limbic systems in check so that we can get on with the work of being wise. It’s difficult to be consistently wise and emotionally disturbed at one and the same time.
This survey research actually confirms the nine middle prefrontal functions that Dan Siegel writes about in The Mindful Brain. Those are: bodily regulation, emotional balance, attuned communication, insight or self-knowing, the ability to self-soothe fearful reactions, intuition, morality and response flexibility – which is the ability to quickly course-correct when new information presents itself. So, we apparently know where wisdom lives in our brains (We have yet to do similar detailed studies on the neurons of the heart!). But by inference, we can guess how to strengthen and stabilize wisdom’s foundations. And bigger, stronger foundations produce a much bigger footprint.
Strengthening the Wisdom Circuits
More good news is that frequent practice with these six or nine attributes very likely grows and strengthens the connections in our Wisdom Circuitry. The more we model for our children, and the more we ourselves act compassionately and altruistically, the greater grows our capacity to act even more compassionately and altruistically in the future. Then, when neural pruning season arrives (apoptosis), because the Wisdom Circuits are demonstrating strength and frequent usage, they will have to be left in place to continue growing and connecting – those neurons won’t fall victim to the Great Neuro-Pruner.
I’ve already written here about Stephen Post’s research on the health benefits of altruism. In the brain, it’s not so much what you know, as who you know. Just like in Hollywood and Silicon Valley, it’s the connections you have that get your movie made or your startup company funded. As a general rule, the more connections the neurons in your brain make – particularly from the prefrontal areas where wisdom appears to reside – to the other areas, the better much of the rest of the heart, brain, mind and body appear to function. This assertion also seems to be borne out by Pat Kuhl’s research that took advantage of the open language window in toddlers. She apparently increased their overall neural connectivity by exposing them to a second language during this critical developmental window. As might be predicted, the results appeared to generalize to other areas, resulting in increased developmental function.
Not So Fast
So that’s the good news: wisdom can be learned and strengthened through practice. The bad news though, is that the Wisdom Circuits apparently don’t work so well with today’s rapid-fire technologies. Communication mediums like cell phone texting and Twitter may be moving us away from developing and strengthening our Wisdom Circuits as this recent study by neuroscience superstar, Antonio Damasio suggests. Developing wisdom it appears, requires us to slow down and take time for reflection.
More bad news is that those in power who might model and make the best use of wisdom, rarely get much training and practice developing it. (Seeing them on the floor of the Senate and House distractedly texting and Twittering does not inspire great confidence, by the way). If the quants and power brokers on Wall Street had brains that were trained and organized early on to be deeply concerned with empathy, self-understanding, compassion or altruism, emotional stability, pro-social concerns and a tolerance for others’ values – the essential components of wisdom – my bet is that we wouldn’t be in the fiscal mess the world is currently in. Robust Wisdom Circuits would have helped us all steer a much safer course.
I hate it when people give me advice, especially the unsolicited variety. It’s almost like they manage to activate a switch in my brain that works to disconnect much of my neural circuitry. I seem to immediately begin dissociating. My eyes glaze over and my mind begins traveling to all sorts of strange places. Something similar happens when I try to take instruction, although with seemingly less disconnect if I’ve initiated it. I attribute it to faulty brain wiring.
Giving expert advice turns out to be a less-than-optimal neurological use of language in teaching and learning. Having a parent or a learned professor stand and lecture for long periods of time is good for approximately ten minutes for most of us (John Medina’s Brain Rule No. 4). After that, distraction takes over and the majority of people simply tune out. In this recent study by Emory University neuropsychiatrist Gregory Berns whom I’ve written about before (author of Iconoclast: A Neuroscientist Reveals How to Think Differently), my experience of disconnection seems to be confirmed. When offered expert advice, a part of our brain actually shuts down!
Strategic Inquiry
Better for teaching and learning are structured situations where exploration and discovery are the encouraged norm. Social activist Fran Peavey suggests that such a structure often results through putting Strategic Questions into play. Here’s a decription of Strategic Questions that I’ve excerpted from my book, Right Listening:
Strategic questions have a number of elements that make them unique and set them apart from run-of-the-mill, everyday questions. They’re generally asked with the intention to reveal ambiguity and open up fresh options for exploration. They can be tough questions because they break through the façade of false confidence and reveal the profound uncertainty that underlies all reality. Experts use them to become experts, not to become advice-givers. These questions invite movement toward growth and new possibilities that empower people, old and young, to create strategies for change in many areas of life.
There are eight key features that distinguish a Strategic Question. First, a Strategic Question is a helpful, dynamic challenge that encourages movement and change. Instead of “Where should I apply for a job?” a Strategic Question might ask, “What work would I be happy doing for the rest of my life?”
A Strategic Question encourages options. Instead of “Who might we get to help us with this project?” a more dynamic possibility might be: “Which people can we support and ally with to help build co-operative synergies?”
A third feature of Strategic Questions is that they are empowering. Examples often begin with the query, “What would it take …?” For example, “What would it take to make you feel your life had ever-expanding purpose and meaning?”
Two more features of Strategic Questions are that they don’t ask “Why?” and they cannot be answered “Yes” or “No.” Questions that ask “Why?” close down creative options and often generate guilt and defensiveness. Questions that can be answered “Yes” or “No” often only skim the surface or bring dialogue and inquiry to a dead end.
Next, Strategic Questions address taboo topics. There is tremendous power to create change inherent in them, because they challenge underlying values and assumptions. An timely example of such a question would be “What was it that kept us from talking honestly about the wisdom of taking out a home mortgage we couldn’t afford?”
A seventh aspect of Strategic Questions is that they tend to be simply structured, focusing on one thing at a time. ”What one thing can you do to make your work more enjoyable?” or “What will restore vitality to your spiritual practice?”
Finally, Strategic Questions assume human equality. They are deeply respectful of people and their capacity to change and grow in healthy ways. They are positive, life-affirming inquiries designed and intended to support human personal, professional and spiritual transformation. (pg. 79-80)
How Now Results in “Wow!”
Strategic questions work to explore the “how” of possibilities. My guess, based not on empirical research, but primarily on how things feel in my brain and body when I connect and resonate creatively with other people, would be that, rather than operating to close down neural connectivity, this method of exploration works to excite and energize and connect brain neurons. Aren’t these then, the kinds of questions we might want to learn to pose to our friends, families and elected representatives?
When I was in my early twenties, just for fun one day I took the entrance exam for Mensa, the high I.Q. group. To my surprise, I found the test challenging but not terribly difficult – their test asked the kinds of conceptual questions that I was generally good at getting right. When I received word that I had passed and was eligible for membership, I was both surprised and ambivalent. Then, after a year of receiving their mailings and going to local meet-ups, I decided to stop being involved. I didn’t like the feeling of elitism, exclusivity and separateness that the organization engendered. It became clear to me that measuring this thing called I.Q. and organizing groups of people around it was a woefully inadequate way to connect with others in any kind of meaningful way. Nor did Mensa provide the healing integration I didn’t realize I was looking for at the time.
As might be expected, this alienation and disaffection had roots planted much earlier. Based on I.Q. measures alone, I was tracked into middle school classes with kids I didn’t much resonate with either socially or emotionally. They were the white collar sons and daughters of doctors and lawyers. They had full sets of the Encyclopedia Britannica at home and wore clean pressed shirts and new shoes to school, while I was a lone voice for early Grunge, twenty years before it became acceptable. Essentially, I ended up being a blue collar stranger in a white collar land, with no Robin Williams to take me Good Will Hunting. I was the only kid in a class of twenty or so who didn’t apply to any college, and by senior year everyone knew not to ask me where I’d been accepted.
Emotional and Social Disconnect
The unfortunate part of this experience is that the emotional and social disconnect had significant negative neurological consequences. According to Emotional Intelligence expert Jeanne Segal it is close relationships throughout our early years that shape the mental circuits responsible for memory, emotion and self-awareness. Positive brain-altering communication is activated on a regular basis by such connections to peers. It’s good to have close friends. Dr. Segal further adds:
And, because the brain remains flexible throughout life, it remains capable of continually changing. Such changes are brought about through nonverbal communication with people with whom we are emotionally attached. Research (psychiatrist) Allen N. Schore also draws this conclusion when he describes “self-organization” as a “dyadic process” or two-person communication, based on play and emotional understanding…. As we grow older, we continue this dependence on one another for changing the way our brains function.
So, much that may have been delayed for me during those years, thankfully turned out not to be lost forever.
The Inadequacy of I. Q Measures
Recently, a smart guy who can accurately recite the mathematical constant, Pi to 22,514 decimal places offered just how inadequate this numerical measure of intelligence actually is. Daniel Tammet, author of Born on a Blue Day, points out that two thirds of the people on planet earth, roughly four and a half billion people, have I.Q. measures ranging from 85 to 115. But what those numbers and the ones on either side of their distribution fail to measure are diverse talents, capacities and interests that are unique to each of us. Also, intelligence is not a fixed entity. It’s often situational, and has a high social-emotional component to it. When I’m around and connected and resonating with smart people, I end up being a smarter person myself. This is one principle that Jeff Bezos founded his company, Amazon.com on. Apparently aware of the principle that “it takes a more organized brain to help organize a less organized brain,” Bezos initially refused to hire anyone whom he didn’t feel was smarter than he was.
But Tammet and I are not the only ones who believe in the error of I.Q. testing. In his book, The Mismeasure of Man, Stephen Jay Gould, another smart guy, argues that I.Q. tests are based on any number of faulty assumptions. He also claims their use as a basis for scientific racism. Gould writes:
…the abstraction of intelligence as a single entity, its location within the brain, its quantification as one number for each individual, (produces a number used) to rank people in a single series of worthiness, invariably to find that oppressed and disadvantaged groups-races, classes, or sexes-are innately inferior and deserve their status. (pp. 24-25)
Gould neglected to mention children and other living creatures in those oppressed and disadvantaged groups. Considering these elements of intelligence, what I.Q. number and degree of worthiness should be assigned to Jasmine as she does her Mother Teresa imitation?
A Betrayal of Children
I love the assessment template that Alice Walker offered years ago, and I’ve mentioned it several times in this column. (I even went so far as to have bumper stickers made that I gave away to friends). Alice asks us, when making any decision, to simply consider: “Is it best for the children.” I would argue that SAT, and GRE and I.Q. tests are not best for the children. How are children really served by being tested and compared with one another? Rather, I think we betray children by testing them in this manner. Invariably, on these measures, some children are destined to show up as “less than.” Wouldn’t they be better served by peers and parents and teachers reflecting back children’s strengths and gifts and joys and encouraging the expansion and development of those areas, rather than regularly identifying areas where they may fall short based on some other-defined standard?
